I sat on a Banana, my lips are chapped and I hate Macy Gray!

OMGosh.....here's how my days going so far:

First of all I SAT on a BANANA this morning ..........it was in the seat of my car as I sat down.........(on second thought - let's not even TALK about THAT right now!)

I think I pulled a muscle in my eye.......it started hurting last night.......(how that

happened - I'm not quite sure..........) .......but my RIGHT EYE hurts when I LOOK out of it..................which has been happening all day - so far (looking out of it - that is)..........it's a little INCONVENIENT for me right now.....................................SERIOUSLY! (NOTE TO SELF: I need to buy an 'Eye Patch!')

My lips are CHAPPED...........they're all scaly and peeling.......they feel like I rubbed them on sand paper all night..........they pretty much look like SH_T right now................. (I don't think I've EVER had chapped lips in my ENTIRE LIFE) ........................ (NOTE TO SELF: Buy Chap stick...............Immediately!)

OH Yeah.......and I ate 6 donuts on the way to work this morning............and washed them down with 2 quarts of cranberry juice!

And I've decided that I seriously dislike "Macy Gray!"

OMGauwd...........I just walked by a mirror and caught a glance at myself...........my lips look like swollen clown lips with 3rd degree burns.............and I think my right eye is now larger than my left eye right now...............and I've now got a nervous twitch ....................are you kidding me....................

Actually, I'm not feeling too well today...........it could be the donuts that I inhaled on my way to work....................or it could be from all the envelopes that I've been licking all morning............(you know.........the glue?).............(I'm definitely calling in sick tomorrow!)

RIP: Corey Haim: 1971 - 2010