Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Wearing sweaty Long Dresses, Singing with my Son and making Wedding Memories!

My son got married this last weekend …(….yes, I know - you’re all thinking I can’t possibly be old enough and I certainly don’t LOOK old enough to have a grown son……But I Do!)…….and of course I got all dressed up and made myself look beautiful for the wedding….(…. which wasn’t very hard for me, since I’m already pretty ‘Smokin Hot’ anyway…)

I wore a LONG DRESS to the wedding (…cause I was the ‘Mother of the Groom’ and that’s what we mother of the grooms do …..) ……anyway……. it was freakin’ HOT on Saturday and I was sweatin’ like a Hog all day long.......and the air conditioning wasn’t working in the reception hall and I was getting sick & tired of sweating in my long sweaty dress.....(...and I was already ornery because the ice in my cocktails was melting way too fast in my drinks - due to the heat....)......and I kept tripping over my dress because I had had way too much VODKA anyway........besides - no-one could see my sexy supple legs under my stupid long dress, right?....…. (....and I was a little pissed to begin with - because everyone said I COULDN'T wear WHITE to the wedding.....)....(....and why the hell couldn't the mother of the groom carry flowers?)  .............I'm just sayin'....

........so by the end of the reception….(just so you know) …I HAD HAD ENOUGH....I found a pair of scissors and I cut my 'flippin' dress OFF…..yep…that’s right….(....NO....I didn't cut the whole damn dress off, people .......it was my son's wedding for Gosh Sakes....).....I just cut the BOTTOM HALF OFF - leaving me with a short dress to wear at the reception - instead of having to wear my long dress all night....)  .........kinda like LONG to SHORT in 3 minutes….(....actually - now that I think about it - I'm a GENIUS to have thought of such a great idea....)  Maybe I'll have to patent my long dress/short dress idea....hmmmm.......(.....I just figured if I ever wanted to wear the stupid dress LONG again - I'd just sew it back together - right?.... )   Like I said - I'M A FLIPPIN' GENIUS!.....

.........then my son and I proceeded to do our Karaoke rendition of ‘Crystal Ball’ by ‘Styx’ during the ‘Mother/ Son’ dance……(...yes, we're Classy like that!)   .....then I did the ‘Thriller Dance’ with all my friends on the dance floor (...yes, I'm cool like that!)

…………..WHY? ……… 'CAUSE THAT'S HOW I ROLL!   
  And helllloooooooo......wasn't this wedding all about me, anyway?  

......HEY - they're just LUCKY I didn't break out the ole' "Coyote Ugly Butt-less Chaps!".......that's all I'm sayin'........



9 comments:

  1. omg, I hope you are so telling the truth, and listen, we want pictures. No, I'm not saying I don't believe you, but still, WE WANT PICTURES. Got it?

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  2. I am a witness to the events above. Yes, Jenny went into Venus mode and cut her dress off...and looked even more fabulous than earlier in the day. Trust me, she will NEVER sew the dress back together.
    The day of the wedding was awesome - except for the part where she yelled at us for not coming right back to the cabin after the reception. Hey, we wanted Taco Bell - what else can we say? (Ok fine, we may have tried to get into a strip club but I forgot my id and didn't know about the switching id trick.)
    Oh, and Jenny makes a mean salsa - goes great with Taco Bell at 3am.

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  3. Oh, she did it!!! And the dress looked even better short! She looked smoking hot! :)

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  4. This is hysterical. I would have paid to see the looks on people's faces after they saw you emerge with your hot mama dress.. That's great!

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  5. Dazee: Oh Yes I did! (Don't you know how cool I am by now?) I don't know if I have any pictures...what the 'freak' was I thinking? (I think I had had way too much Vodka by then...) :):)

    Anonymous 1: I'm still not talking to you! How dare you make plans to go to the strip club with out me!

    Anonymous 2: Of course I looked 'Smokin HOT'.....helllloooooo....I'm Jenny Brown!

    Kurt: It WAS awesome (....but of course you know how awesome I am anyway, right?....) :):) Yes - I'm THAT cool!

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  6. Long time now talk...I pretty much abandoned the blog world for a while...anyway, all I got to say miss hotness is this...the only thing that could of made the day any worse for you if if they had decorated with garden gnomes. ha ;)

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  7. Hi! Love your blog! Sounds like your wedding was fabulous!! LoL..http;/northernsunshine72.blogspot.com

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  8. Marty....Oh how I've missed you, girlfriend! I've been wondering where the heck you've gone....no worries - we all need a little time off now and then. Thanks for visiting me again....and try to keep in touch cause' you're one of my favorite blog buddies! :):)

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  9. Marty....that last comment from Anonymous was me, Jenny....I'm having trouble commenting on my own blog and I didn't realize I was commenting anonymously!

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