Cereal, anyone?

OK…….Here’s a topic that I just can’t resist: CEREAL!

You’ll soon realize that I’m not a huge fan of this 'breakfast in a box'! What’s up with “Cereal” anyway? ………….. I mean….I know it’s the breakfast of choice for all young children around the world, but come-on, folks………we’re adults………….do we really need to be eating this stuff?

If you're over 13 years old and still eating cereal..............news flash............ you look like an idiot with that spoon in your hand!

And what’s a box of cereal running for now-a days? Maybe somewhere between $3.00 – $5.00 for one box of wheat, oats and/or sugar. What a waste of money, if you ask me! I can buy a loaf of bread, one dozen eggs and a pound of butter for that….......think about it!

And does a bowl of cereal even FILL you up? (Maybe if you’re 4 years old!)

Don’t tell me this breakfast of champions is gonna fill up a full grown man…..because I’m not going to believe it! (Maybe if the bowl of cereal is followed by 2 eggs, 3 slices of bacon and 2 pieces of toast, maybe then.)

AGAIN............... (and please pay attention)...........the only way you can eat a bowl of cereal and FEEL FULL is: 1.) if you're still in diapers, OR 2.) if you're anorexic and in need of professional help!

I know..................maybe if you use a ‘large mixing bowl’ instead of one of those small sissy bowls. Or, I got it..........you might as well just pour milk in the box itself and eat the ENTIRE box............... yeah, that's it!

Wouldn’t it be easier to just eat an apple and a piece of toast and be done with it! (PLUS: Then you don’t even have any dirty dishes to contend with!)

Pet Peeve #2: People who don’t finish their entire bowl of cereal. You’ve got to be kidding me………..people…….it’s one bowl of stinking cereal……….are you serious? Don’t tell me you’re too full to finish it………… what the hell am I supposed to do with the leftover milk and soggy wheat? ...........................I can’t pour it in the garbage, cause’ it will leak! I can’t pour it down the sink, because it will clog my drain! Just eat the frickin’ stuff……….you wanted it, remember!?

And WHO goes to a restaurant and orders cereal? (Skinny little healthy people, that’s who!............ And I’m sure they do it just to annoy me!) Order a stack of pancakes or order an omelet, already, like all the other normal people in the world, will ya!

Oh, and get this………….I’ve never met anyone who eats as much cereal as my daughter, Brooke! She’s certainly a fan of this ‘breakfast in the box’! She’d eat cereal for every meal, if she could! She loves MILK! And she loves CEREAL! (I'm beginning to think she was switched at birth!) Her favorite is “Special K”, by the way! Maybe that’s why she’s so thin. Isn’t cereal what all the thin ‘hot’ bitches and movie stars eat for breakfast? Well I do believe that that certainly explains why I’m size 14 and fat! (Maybe I should lay off the eggs and waffles for awhile!)

Don’t get me wrong……….I’m OK with cereal in general – but JUST NOT for a meal…………….. maybe just for a snack!
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